Track Insight / Lyrics
Woke up on a Tuesday, sand in my hat
The bottle's beside me, but the bottle is flat
I checked every tavern from Tortuga to Spain
The barkeep just laughed and he poured me the rain
I searched in me pockets, I searched in me boots
I searched every chest full of cursed gold and loot
But the map on me table, it pointed to me
The treasure was drunk — and the pirate was free
[PRE-
The compass don't spin 'cause it knows where I've been
It's pointing right at me again...
🔥 (HOOK)
WHY IS THE RUM ALWAYS GONE?
(Because I drank it! Because I drank it!)
WHY IS THE RUM ALWAYS GONE?
(Because I drank it, lads — and now it's all gone!)
Raise a glass to the fool on the sea
The rum ain't missing — the rum is in ME!
WHY IS THE RUM ALWAYS GONE?
(Because I drank it — SING ALONG!)
They told me "Jack, save some for the crew"
I said "Boys, that's a rumor that never came true"
The Kraken can keep all his tentacles curled
I've got me a bottle worth more than the world
But the world keeps on spinning, the tide keeps on turning
And somewhere a tavern is silently burning
'Cause I took the last drop, and I'll take it again
The rum's not the problem — the problem's the men
[PRE-
The stars keep their secrets, the sea keeps her dead
But the truth is much simpler instead...
🔥
WHY IS THE RUM ALWAYS GONE?
(Because I drank it! Because I drank it!)
WHY IS THE RUM ALWAYS GONE?
(Because I drank it, lads — and now it's all gone!)
Raise a glass to the fool on the sea
The rum ain't missing — the rum is in ME!
WHY IS THE RUM ALWAYS GONE?
(Because I drank it — SING ALONG!)
(slower, almost tender — then explode)
There's a bottle in heaven with me name on the glass
And a devil in hell who's been saving his last
But I'll sail this ship till the barrel runs dry
And I'll drink to the day that I... (pause)... never die!
[GUITAR/ 🎻🎸
(fiddle trades licks with distorted guitar — crowd stomps and claps)
(key up, gang vocals, full crowd)
WHY IS THE RUM ALWAYS GONE?
(BECAUSE I DRANK IT! BECAUSE I DRANK IT!)
WHY IS THE RUM ALWAYS GONE?
(BECAUSE I DRANK IT, LADS — AND NOW IT'S ALL GONE!)
Raise a glass to the fool on the sea
The rum ain't missing — the rum is in ME!
WHY IS THE RUM ALWAYS GONE?
(BECAUSE I DRANK IT!)
WHY IS THE RUM ALWAYS GONE?
(BECAUSE I DRANK IT!)
WHY IS THE RUM ALWAYS GONE?!
(...because I drank it.)
(spoken, drunk, fading)
"But... where's the rum gone? ...
Oh. Right. Aye. That'd be me."
(glass shatters, seagull squawk, accordion wheezes out)
